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entering this family entering an unwritten play my entrance was not until after the exposition towards the end of the last act i had to make up my own lines my own pauses my own silences reflecting all the while about whether my lines pauses and silences complemented what had already happened although appearing to be doing my bit without shame to anyone without the aid of the prompter anticipating the applause at the end or at my exit but it's not happening not happening and with my peripheral awareness i begin to sense a kind of unease some unfulfilled expectation from the audience as well as from the rest of the cast there appears to be something unfulfilled about my role or my execution of it and as the remaining characters start to exit and people begin to file out i suddenly realize there's been no showdown no showdown how was i supposed to know i was the deus ex machina